eleanor is nine!

today we celebrated eleanor's ninth birthday! last year's theme was toy story and this year it was trolls ... 1990 style. it was a really sweet day. 

showing rufus her new gremlin doll. they are obsessed with that movie right now.

 
her cousins and friend from school brought their american girl dolls to the party, so of course eleanor placed little plates, forks, cups and pitchers of lemonade on the table for them. they also made teeny t-shirts for their dolls.

gramma is teaching him how to blow bubbles.

today she got new roller skates, tomorrow we are going ice skating. 

this may be my new favorite photo of her.

i always find the messy table after the party so lovely. a beautiful sign of a happy time. xo.

nine years

my eleanor isobel is turning nine years old on the twenty ninth of this month and i could literally cry buckets of tears. from the day she was born, she has been the light of my life. she has taught me more than anyone else could ever teach me ... she taught me how to be a mother, a friend and a better human. like, she has been everything for me. 

today her and i went on a little day date to the thrift store and then had lunch at tropical smoothie (her favorite place to eat). it was just a simple, short, little getaway, but it was so good for our relationship. since her brothers were born, finding one on one time has been pretty tough, but we make it happen when we can because it is so, so, so important ... she had three dollars saved and big hopes of finding a porcelain doll. she named her emily because we are in the middle of reading a little princess and emily is the name of sara crewe's doll. i love that. 

anyway, i can't believe my girl is nine. her birthday party is the twenty eighth and we have been making lists and planning our little hearts out. the theme this year is classic trolls and american girl because she couldn't choose and i'm like, how bout both! ... can't wait. xo

my thrift store finds. 

motherhood affirmations / how to stop comparing

when i was a little girl, i never once asked myself, "i wonder if my mom compares herself to other moms?" like, i knew that every mom had their own way of doing things, but i guess i never questioned how that made my mom feel. why would that even be something that she would worry about? anyway, maybe she didn't compare (I've never asked her) and maybe not all moms do, but i feel like some do .. and i feel that even though comparing your motherhood to someone elses is totally damaging, i also think it's probably pretty normal.

when i became a mother, back in 2008, i was basically a kid myself. i knew very little about what to expect and honestly, was a little aloof to the whole being a mom thing. i didn't compare myself to other moms because i didn't know any other moms in real life and the social media beast hadn't swallowed me up yet ... things were easier back then for me. sure, i made sooooo many mistakes, but i was confident. i knew that i loved my baby and that was the only guide i needed. so now i ask myself, what happened to that confidence? why do i overanalyze every mom move i make? why do i scroll through social media and think things like, "i wish i could be more like her?"

basically my point here is to put an end to that and start fresh again. here are some things i have been jotting down in my mind to help get me there.

1. it doesn't matter whatsoever what time another mom puts her baby to bed and where her baby sleeps. it doesn't matter at all.

2. it doesn't matter how another mom gave birth and where she gave birth and how long the birth lasted and how much her baby weighed. it doesn't matter at all.

3. it doesn't matter if her baby only eats avocado and your baby has a popsicle for breakfast. it doesn't matter.

4. it doesn't matter if all of your babies were born via cesarean and don't you dare hesitate to announce that. (me)

5. if you hang around a mom friend who is constantly making comparisons out loud by saying things like, "oh well my kid .."  shut that shit down (politely, of course).

6. if you follow a mom on social media that gives you feelings of self doubt, unfollow. it is totally okay to do that and you will feel so much lighter.

7. stop thinking things like, "she's more beautiful than i am" and start thinking things like, "she is beautiful and so am i."

8. don't look at another mom and immediately find something to judge her for. look for something to be inspired by instead.

9. remember that it is just as easy to lift yourself up as tear yourself down.

10. it doesn't matter if her kids are in all the activities and yours are not. it doesn't matter.

11. it doesn't matter that another mom's house looks like something out of a magazine and your couch has permanent marker scribbles all over it and you can't afford to replace it. (me, ha ha) it doesn't matter.

12. lastly, you love your children more than anything and you are doing an amazing job. give yourself a little more credit.

can anyone relate? xo

basic donuts

okay, bear with me ... there are literally children climbing on me right now so this is gonna be a real quick post with probably a million typos ...

anyway, donuts! my mom got me this pan for christmas and today i used it for the first time. well, wolfgang and i. lately we have been bonding over food. he is all about cooking and baking and i am all about letting him help. his tiny voice and little helping hands are to die for.

okay, moving right along. i found this super easy recipe on pinterest, of course, but i tweaked it a bit.

1. preheat oven to 350. spray pan with non stick cooking spray.
2. in a large bowl whisk together one egg, 1/4 cup vegetable oil, one cup water and one box of dry cake mix. we used strawberry, but you could use any. next time we are going for chocolate.
3. spoon mixture into muffin pan ... this batter will make eighteen donuts (three pans worth)
4. bake in the oven for about tenish minutes. maybe a little longer. just poke em with a toothpick.
5. immediately move to cooling rack and allow them to cool completely before frosting them!

okay, frosting:

1. melt two tablespoons butter.
2. in a large bowl, mix 1.5 cups powdered sugar with the melted butter.
3. slowly add milk, one tablespoon at a time. i used four tablespoons ... you want the frosting to be a little runny! thick frosting will not work. i mean it will, but wouldn't be as pretty.
4. take your donut and dip it into the frosting, bottom side. so the soft top will actually be the bottom on the donut. make sense? ... after you dip the donut, lift it up and turn it from side to side, making sure to evenly coat it.
5. that's it! add sprinkles or whatever topping you want!

... you could also add a little food coloring if you want colorful donuts.

i hope this all made sense, my kids are cray right now and i gotta go! :)

seriously, these are so easy and delicious. they are basically just cake in donut form, but so fun and would be so easy to prepare a lot of them for a birthday party or whatever! xo