my first poem // on becoming a mother of three

"a tiny baby begins to grow, a happy belly begins to glow." -Devendra Banhart

in two weeks we will know more about you.
nearly halfway there.
choosing names.
tiny pushes against my skin.
you are really in there.
please be okay.

a mother of three. a mother of three.
some days it's like walking through a thick fog.
some days i am lost in loneliness.
worried i will fail you. and you. and you.
please be okay.

taking deep breaths and allow smiles to grow on my face.
kiss and hug them.
love them.
show them worries, but not too much.
cry for them and with them, always.
please be okay.

"mama."
hear every call. listen.
be warm and say, "yes, darling."
dance and sing and imagine falling into clouds.
be warm.
please be okay.

nearly halfway there.
mother of three.
you can do this. you can do this.
everything you need is here.
you'll be okay.