a saturday morning smile

i woke up this morning with so much clarity. so often we worry about what other people think of us, don't we? recently someone i thought i had a good rapport with suddenly stopped following me and im not gonna lie, it's been a buggin' me because of that need to know why ..., ya know? it really stings. i mean, not enough to ruin my life or anything, but it bothered me. and this morning i woke up with a big smile on my face because .... oh, well. keep it movin'. so what that person doesn't care about me or so what that maybe i rub them the wrong way. it's okay. not everyone will like us or think we are cool. all i need to do is feel thankful for the other people i have met who have been a positive light in my life and try my hardest to be a positive light in theirs. i need to stop whining and fretting over the negative. 

anyway, i woke up to the distant sounds of wolfgang blabbing in his crib basically saying, "mama, im awake, come get me." and i walked into eleanor's room and she had one of my old dresses on and was talking to herself in the mirror. i kissed my husband's head and let him sleep and the kids and i came downstairs for our morning breakfast routine. it was like the fog in my head had suddenly cleared. sunny skies in my brain. it's okay. it's okay. it's great. 

today i will embrace normal. i will embrace my real life because it's pretty damn good. the kids are watching this old house on pbs and i'm sitting on the couch looking at pinterest fails and cracking up over how great real life is. we try so hard as humans and sometimes it's just a disaster, but that is what makes it all so genuine and good. genuine. genuine. genuine. and if it's not, leave it alone and keep it movin'. 

this photo i chose for this post is not the best quality and a little crooked, but i adore it. it was from a few days ago when daddy got home from work. he always scoops wolfgang up and they walk around pointing at things and saying, "oooooooooooo" it's wonderful and real and something that should never be taken for granted. 

clarity. 

arick sent me this video the other day and if you watch it you will see how truly great this planet can be. genuine and true. also, it will just make you smile big time. 

lastly, just now eleanor started cracking up and i looked up and wolfgang had climbed on top of the speakers and was just standing there grinning from ear to ear. ahhhh, everything is fine. everything is wonderful. happy saturday. 

days like these

today was emotional. our family is in the process of accepting change/something new and it has emotions on high around here...i will get into specifics another day. you know how when one person in the family is off key, the rest of the family sort of follows along. i think that is what makes being part of a family so tender and sweet. 

it seems like a lot of people think being emotional is being sad and that is not always the case. we haven't been sad, we have just been easily thrown into fits of laughter or bucketfuls of tears. and when i say we, i mean the kids and i ... my husband copes with change well and all he really needs everyday is a few moments when he can have his face in a book. in fact, not having time to read everyday is just about the only thing that stresses him out. he is such an interesting person. he ordered us new stockings with our names engraved and when i checked the mail and opened the box i could have burst with excitement and joy. he is so, so good to us and deserves those moments each day to do what he loves ... even if it is just twenty minutes alone with a good book. 

anyway, tonight when i tuck the kiddos into bed i will smother them with kisses and feel so thankful for this little family of mine. emotional days or the best days, they are our days together and i wouldn't trade it for any other life. 

i have been listening to this song a lot as of late. i catch myself softly humming it as i tiptoe around our house throughout the day. it's just one of those songs that make you feel everything. 

holidays // a tree farm

today papa took the day off work so we could spend it together at the tree farm. it was wonderful. eleanor ran all over the place yelling, "i like this one! how about this one?!" we walked up and down every row and of course we ended up going with the one we saw first. wolfgang couldn't believe his luck ... dirt, dirt and more dirt. oh, and mud! he pointed and smiled at almost every tree.

i don't really have much to say about it, maybe because im full of roasted vegetables and exhausted at the moment. all i wanna do is be a slug on the couch ... but i wanted to share these photos of our perfect day. xo.

for the love of houseplants

let me begin with saying that i am in no way, shape or form a plant expert. everything i know is from trial and error. trust me, i killed a whole lot of cacti before i accepted the fact that my house is just too darn cold for them to survive.

today, i would like to share my favorite houseplants and how i take care of them. i have more plants that i will not show today because i just wanted to show the ones that are great for beginners. plants that i will call adaptable, meaning they do not require hot sun for eight hours a day.


1. the sansevieria

i have two of these guys, a large one that i keep in wolfgang's room and a small one i keep next to my window in my bedroom. the large one gets watered one cup every other thursday. the small one gets watered 1/2 cup every other tuesday.

2: the aglaonema

i keep this gal in my bathroom. she gets watered 1 cup every other wednesday. 

3. the pothos

my oldest plant. around here we call her big mama. she has been with me for almost eight years now and she has felt it all ... the bickering between arick and i, the cries of a newborn babe, eleanor's singing and dancing, wolfgang's tiny fingers playing in her dirt. she has thrived through every move. she is just apart of the family. i have propagated her many, many times. she has offspring all over our house. She gets watered every saturday morning after i eat my granola and drink my OJ. her babes do, as well.

4. the spider plant

my mother has several spider plants at her house and in the summer she puts them in her sun room and it's magical. i really hope my next house has a sun room. gah! i have one her spider's offspring. she is growing pretty well, but i know she will take off once spring rolls around. we do not have many sunny days in winter here in ohio. anyway, she gets watered after my pothos every saturday. 

5. air plants

i recently jumped on the air plant wagon and i refuse to get off. i adore them. i purchased them from FERN studio here in ohio. they are super sweet and easy to take care of. all you have to do is soak them in water, leaves down for twenty minutes once a week. i soak mine every thursday. in between soaks you can spray them with water. they drink from their leaves, not their roots. i will definitely be getting more of these little fellas!

TIPS! keep a calendar, so that way no plant gets forgotten and go hungry :) also, plant care makes a great chore for our little ones!

thanksgiving

this year i hosted my first thanksgiving. as i sit here on my bed, eating left over sweet potato casserole with gooey mallows on top, i feel pretty good about how it all went. i was supposed to host thanksgiving two years ago, but our kitchen was being remodeled and then last year wolfgang was a brand new pup ... but this year it finally happened. at first, i must say i was completely overwhelmed ... i mean, how on earth do you cook a turkey for hours and all of your side dishes in the same oven? at the same time?! it seemed impossible. well, i managed and in fact, all of the food was ready to eat before most of our guests arrived. phew.

i made:

turkey with sage, orange peels, rosemary, butter and peppercorn
mashed potatoes
green beans with almonds
sweet potato casserole
stuffing

i asked my parents to bring the corn because they grow their own and it is delicious. my mother n law brought the pies and my sister n law brought the rolls.

the night before, i sat on the couch, watched some TV and cut my potatoes and snipped green beans. i am so happy that i got that out of the way the night before. the day of i woke up at 6:00AM and we ate at noon. sigh. thanksgiving.

eleanor made wreaths for the door and napkin rings for the kid's table. she was thrilled to help and was hopping around the house singing songs and holding up her master pieces high in the air yelling, "isn't it beautiful, mama? what do you think?!" wolfgang crashed her creating party many, many times and i would see him walk as wobbly and fast as he could holding one of her crayons and she would be chasing after him. oh, i promise you ... it was as precious as it sounds.

anyway, now let's get to the sentimental, gushy stuff ... for this is my diary after all...

i woke up at 6:00AM like i said. it was still dark and everyone was sound asleep. everyone, but me. i didn't dread the sound of that alarm clock like i thought i would. i sat up immediately when i heard the ringing. it was almost as if it was my voice i heard. whispering, "let's be together" in my ear. "it's okay, they ARE fine." but of course, i still woke up arick and told him to make sure wolfgang didn't roll off the bed. i walked downstairs and left almost every light off. i wanted it to be dark. i wanted it to feel like i was the only thing around. i began to prepare food right away, but i have no recollection of it. i was lost in thought the whole time. thinking about nothing, really, but so much, too. you know what i mean? it felt good not to be interrupted. silence IS golden. i could almost hear myself think. standing in my dark kitchen, the aromas of sliced oranges and chopped herbs filling my nose that led right to the depths of my soul. it was everything. i didn't even need coffee. i was awake.

i heard the cries of wolfgang at 7:05AM. i walked upstairs, sat in bed and nursed my sweet boy. still in the dark, still in my thoughts ... listening to his snorty breaths and feeling his tiny hand play with my hair. i thought how thankful i am for this simple life of mine. thankful for the family that would be coming over. thankful that we can afford to feed everyone. thankful that we have the choice to have the lights on or off. thankful for our warm beds. thankful for my husband, for he is the reason for my happiness. thankful for my babies. oh, man. but what i felt most thankful for is that hour and five minutes i had to myself. that hour and five minutes alone in the dark being still and quiet. i guess i didn't know much i needed it, but i did. i really did.

i hope you all had a wonderful thanksgiving. do not forget to be thankful for YOU and all the good YOU bring to the others you say you're thankful for. xo.

giving thanks in my kitchen

this morning as i sat down at the bar to enjoy cherry preserves on sourdough and a hot cup of orange spice tea, i began to look around and appreciate this life of mine. the sun was shining, wolfgang was crawling around at my feet and i could hear curious george in the background and a little eleanor bouncing up and down on the couch. we have a daddy who is out in the world working hard so that our bellies are fed, our bodies are clothed and sheltered from the cold. i thought to myself, "cherish today." let all of those annoying, worrying thoughts go and just be happy and thankful. we spend so much time in negative thought, don't we? 

i know i already did a tour of our kitchen, but here are some more photos because it is thanksiving time and i am grateful for this room. it is where i spend most of my days ... cooking for the people i love. what are you thankful for today? 

  meanwhile, on the floor ... a little wolfgang is having a moment.

joy // a milestone

 wolfgang started walking on his birthday. watching him waddle around and plop on his bottom over and over again has brought us so much joy. the first time he walked across the room it was like someone declared war was over. daddy, eleanor and i cheered and clapped and jumped up and down. nothing else in the world mattered. we were the only people on the planet. we had witnessed something so new and magical. wolfgang was ever so pleased with himself and loves the praise that comes with walking. he walks and grins, walks and grins. all. day. long. with this new milestone comes new explorations around our house. we cannot let this boy out of our sight! he is pulling plugs from sockets, climbing in the bathtub, playing in the toilet, taking trash out of the trashcan and putting toys in or trying to find a way to make it up the steps. it has been exhausting and i haven't been able to get much done around the house. today when he went down for his second nap i had a pile of laundry to put away, but instead i fell over on my bed. i exhaled and laid flat on my back. i looked around my room and let my mind wander. i thought about the holidays and preparing for thanksgiving and how i haven't purchased a single christmas gift yet. i thought about how awful i must look and how i do not have the energy to do anything about it. i thought about how much i miss my husband because he has been gone a lot lately. but mostly i just thought about laying there. soaking in that few minutes i could just exist and be still and quiet. after his cat nap he sat up and gave me this cheeky smile. gosh ... so much joy. so. much. joy.